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We tend to think about personal growth as something that happens to one person. You begin to understand more about yourself. You start setting boundaries: asking for what you need, making different choices, or letting go of things you’ve carried for a very long time. Maybe you become more independent, stop over-functioning for everyone else, stop needing to be rescued, or stop stepping in to rescue someone else. But...all of that shifts how you move through the world, which m

I recently spoke at a Konenki event about anxiety and mood changes during peri/menopause. Hormones are a critical part of that conversation, but those hormones are also affecting women who already have full lives, and sometimes very little room left for anything to change. In the talk, I described something that can be hard to see when you’re in the eye of it: being able to keep everything going doesn’t necessarily mean the way you’re doing it is working well. Being the capab

We often use “empty nest” as shorthand for sadness. The picture is familiar: you drop your kid off, come home, stand in the doorway of their bedroom...and cry. Sure, sometimes that is exactly what happens. But there can also be relief. Excitement. Pride. Freedom. Guilt about the freedom. A shocking amount of time spent checking Life360 or Find My, and questioning whether you want to share this new hobby with others. There are so many wildly mixed emotions that trying to decid

I love back to school photos. The preschoolers carrying giant backpacks. The elementary school kids with missing teeth, and shiny sneakers. The middle and high school students who agreed to one picture...but would clearly like everyone to move this along. And then there are the college dorm rooms...beds made, lights hung, storage containers somehow fitting under every available surface, and parents trying to remember whether they packed everything while also trying not to thi

Your kids are able to make their own plans, get places on their own, navigate life. Sort of. But they still need you, and now, so do your parents. Older woman being hugged by younger woman, representing the Sandwich Generation. What makes being part of the Sandwich Generation so exhausting isn’t just that there’s too much to do. It’s that your entire emotional orientation is split in two directions at once. You are standing between people who are moving toward expansion and p

Before we get into this, if you’d rather listen than read, you can watch a clip of my talk from the other night, here: https://tinyurl.com/stillmetherapy I had the opportunity to speak on a panel with the Konenki Group recently; my part was about how many of us start to think and feel about our bodies and our selves as we reach perimenopause and menopause. There’s often this assumption that by the time we reach midlife, we are “supposed to” (what does that even mean?) have

Let’s be real: insurance is broken . Not because people are lazy or trying to “game the system.” Not because clients aren’t doing enough. But because the system itself was never designed for the complexity of being human—especially when it comes to mental health. If you’ve ever tried to use your insurance for therapy and walked away feeling confused, discouraged, or vaguely ashamed for not understanding the rules, nothing has gone wrong. You’ve just collided with a system tha